I have a real problem with some little creepy crawly earwigs that are hanging around my neighborhood. They invite themselves over every time I fire up the barbecue. I am not sure why they think they can just show up whenever they feel like it and I am really getting tired of their rude and unseemly behaviour. And to make matters worse, they have misinterpreted my screaming and flailing when I see them as some kind of friendly greeting and so, they bring more of their friends and relatives to play when they think I am not looking which makes barbecue time quite stressful.
This was really getting on my nerves and so I did what any intelligent person would do and went right to my computer to do a google search on how to deal with earwigs. Have no fear – I made sure to triangulate my research and ensure that the method I chose was approved by PETA. I am an animal lover for the most part, but earwigs are just really difficult to warm up to. I mean, they aren’t all that great to look at, they are really squirmy, seem kind of slimy and those little fellas can move very fast – and could probably slide into your nose or your ears if you aren’t looking. My research was successful and I was able to uncover a strategy to deal with the earwigs that, I am happy to report, works like a charm.
What you do is fill a plastic container with some cooking oil and add the special ingredient of soy sauce because I guess even earwigs enjoy a Chinese buffet. Put the container where the earwigs seems to be hanging out and they will make their way to the container where they will proceed to go for little swim in what to them is a delicious meal. That’s a problem for them because apparently swimming in oil and soy sauce is not that easy. I wouldn’t know; I have never tried it but from the number dead earwigs that have collected in the container over the last few days, that seems to be the case. I have emptied the container every couple of days and each time it is full of earwigs. I guess it is true that when you see one, there are thousands around the corner.
I did have a scare the first day I went out to check the container because it was no longer under the barbecue where I had placed it but had been moved out into the open. I checked with Loverboy to see if he moved it but he denied having anything to do with it and I believe him because he doesn’t like creepy crawly critters either. I then spent a few stressful moments trying to figure out who or what might have moved it. Of course, my imagination ran amok as it does from time to time and I started scanning the yard for wild creatures like skunks or racoons or grizzly bears or dinosaurs. Nothing showed its face at that moment so I quickly pushed the container back under the barbecue and hoped for the best. Luckily, the container has remained there untouched since then because obviously skunks or racoons or grizzly bears or dinosaurs don’t like creepy crawly critters in their Chinese buffet either!
Anyway, I am hopeful that the next time I barbecue, I will be able do so in peace, without having to deal with those pesky critters. I will keep that little container under my barbecue in the event that this might encourage them to find an earwig friendly neighbourhood to live in – if there is such a thing. Let me know if you live in such a neighbourhood and I will send them your way. Thanks!
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